Well… Its been a while. Hope you are all keeping well, especially in the worlds current climate. I haven’t wrote a blog post in a long time and I have honestly missed it a lot. I stopped blogging as at the time I was going through some struggles with my body image whilst still in the recovery process from my eating disorder and I felt like I was lying to you all trying to be positive and to be honest, I was finding it very hard and draining to constantly write about my mental health and my recovery and felt like it was dragging back old habits as I don’t think I had completely come to terms with everything myself, which is why things are going to be changing around here. I will still be focusing my blog on mental health, recovery and advice however I also want to write blog posts on other subjects I enjoy so expect some lifestyle, homeware, self care and money saving posts too! When my blog was all focused on mental health I was still trying to figure out who I was without my eating disorder as I had lived with it from the age of 10 and I think blogging about it all the time was making it harder for me to differentiate myself from my disorder ( something which you are taught to do in therapy) so I decided I needed to take a break from it and that break may have lasted longer than I expected but I am back now! As you can see I have changed blogging platforms as another reason why I was demotivated to blog was because I did not like the look of my website I have also changed my blogs name. I used to be scared that people I know would find my blog if I had my name on it and I was scared of being judged but now I do not give a f**k. I barely see the people I was worried would find it and if anybody I know finds this website and judges me for it then they are not the type of people I want in my life. The people I have around me now are the best support system I could wish for and because I have them I don’t care about other peoples opinions anymore. The things I went through could potentially help somebody else get out of it and seek help so I can not let other peoples judgemental opinions stop me from talking and sharing my own experiences.
A lot has happened since I last blogged. We now have to wear face masks when going to the shop and I cant go to visit my parents but I can go to the pub. This year has been a strange one to say the least. At the start of this year I went through a very difficult time due to somethings going on in my personal life and from being in a work environment that I was not happy in and I just let a lot of things build up and had to leave my work place for my own sake. Then the virus hit and lockdown happened and I had a lot of time to think about what I actually want from life and my goals and I really do think lockdown helped me a lot. The change I can see in myself from the start of the year to now is crazy. In January I was coming home from work, crying on my boyfriend and messaging my best friends ranting everyday and now I am in a new job that I really enjoy and I get on with everyone that I am working with.
The main thing that has happened since I last wrote a blog post is that I have moved out of my family home and into my boyfriend and I’s first home together. There is a lot of work that needs doing to it to make it more homely and to give it our desired style so keep an eye out for some home decor posts. I also passed my driving test and am still trying to get more confident with driving as I struggle quite badly with anxiety around driving but I am getting a little bit better with it. We got a van for us to turn into a camper van, I can’t lie, I haven’t participated much but my boyfriends done a good job with it haha. My mental health is a lot better than it was when I last wrote a blog post, there has still been hard times since then, as I described earlier, but right now I am doing well and looking forward to getting back into blogging and I have lots of posts planned.
I hope you are all doing well and keeping safe through these uncertain times!